Skoshi

by Katherine Allen

Table of Contents
Part 7 appears
in this issue.

part 8

* * *

When Skoshi exited the captain’s cabin she was surprised to see the doctor there. “Ah, Takshi. Just the person I was looking for,” the doctor said with a smile on his face. “I heard about what happened, and I came to tell you. If those twins get too be to much hassle, bring them down to sickbay and I will give them a first-hand... lesson in what happens when a tranquilizer is introduced into the bloodstream. How does that sound?”

“Sir,” Skoshi replied laughing, “I think that sounds great. But, I doubt their parents would approve.”

“Actually, their mother came to me with the suggestion. ‘Doctor’ she said to me, ‘I realize that you might think this a little against your oath. But, would you approach Mr. Hara and offer to occasionally tranquilize the twins?’

“Now, as you can imagine, I thought she was joking. I mean, a mother asking me to knock her children unconscious. I began to explain to her about the hypocrite... I mean the Hippocratic oath, when she asked me if a prescription would help.

“Of course it would. And she gave me... amazingly enough... a prescription for tranquilizers, one for each of the twins. I asked her were she had gotten them and she told me that on their last trip, the doctor on board had been the one they had latched onto. The doctor, being an older lady who missed her grandchildren had been delighted at first.

“But... after a few weeks, it began to wear on her and on the twins’ parents. So, when the family came in for their physical she had told the parents that they were too stressed and that the twins needed tranquilizers. She told them that it would increase the well-being of the family in general. Now, can you top that? You not only have the parent’s permission, but you have a doctor’s prescription for it. You have to take advantage of it.”

During the story, Skoshi’s small chuckle had turned into a laugh. “Oh, Doctor,” she said, with tears rolling down her face, “that is wonderful! It sounds like something you would do! Yes! Yes, I will remember that, I may have to use it! Thank you, I think you are a miracle worker. That was just what I needed! Thank you.” Then, looking around to make sure no one could see, she gave him a big hug and a kiss, right there in the corridor. Then she turned and walked down the hallway, still laughing.

Almost as soon as Mr. Grimes boarded the ship he was at war with the twins. Since the twins’ parents were temporarily part of the crew, they assembled along with the rest to greet the newest passenger. And since no one in their right mind, or out of it for that matter, would leave the twins alone on the ship, they had to come, too.

The children were a pretty sight to see, as they stood at attention next to their parents, clean for once. The formal greetings went beautifully, despite the fact that Mr. Grimes was a cranky, disagreeable old man. The captain had just breathed a sigh of relief when, as Mr. Grimes was walking into the ship; Daniel slipped and tripped Mr. Grimes. Down they both went in a jumble of legs. Immediately everyone had jumped over to them and began sorting things out. The captain was apologizing and assuring Mr. Grimes it had only been an accident. Mr. Grimes, however, was not in the mood to be reassured.

He looked around and practically pounced on poor Daniel, who was more frightened than hurt. “You did that on purpose, you horrible little boy! It has always been my belief that little children should be seen as little as possible, never heard, and never tripped over!! Now scat! Before I take it into my mind to teach you a lesson in manners.”

All through this speech, Skoshi, the captain, the twins’ parents as well as most of the rest of the crew, had slowly been turning red. Even the doctor, whom the twins tormented frequently, could be seen clenching his fists. Yes, Hannah and Daniel were a lot of trouble. But they weren’t truly malicious. And to hear this man abusing them was simply wrong.

The captain stepped up to Mr. Grimes, his anger barely contained. “Mr. Grimes,” he said in a very sweet voice, which to those who knew him well meant that he was dangerously close to exploding, “I’m sure that Daniel only slipped. It was a simple accident. Now, why don’t I show you to your suite where you will be much more comfortable.” Taking Mr. Grimes firmly by the arm he steered him into the ship.

After they left Skoshi and the twins’ parents tried to calm down Daniel and Hannah. Daniel was crying, having been understandably frightened by the old man. Hannah however, was angry. “How dare that nasty old man threaten to... to... discipline Daniel? I’m not sure what discipline means, but how dare he? Daniel is my twin and I’m the only one allowed to yell at him, besides mommy and daddy and Taki and the captain!”

Later, after the twins’ were in bed, Skoshi and their parents were laughing over Hannah’s rather funny outburst. She and Daniel lay in bed planning. Things looked grim for Mr. Grimes.

From then on, every day the twins managed to torment their new... “friend.” Whenever they passed him in the hallways they always began talking loudly and laughing. They would be noisy at dinner, slurping their soup, and chattering like magpies. Since that was how they normally ate it didn’t really matter to anyone except Mr. Grimes. He would huff, and puff, and scowl. It was a rather awkward situation.

The one good thing about the feud was that the twins were so distracted by annoying Mr. Grimes that they completely forgot about following their ‘Taki’ around. And the doctor was actually getting out of the habit of twitching whenever he heard their names. In fact things were getting almost... dull.

Sadly however, that would never last. The twins were getting a little tired of just annoying Mr. Grimes. He was not reacting as much any more, and they felt the need to push his “fragile grip on sanity,” as their parents had put it, a little farther over the edge.

* * *

The whole family had always been a fan of old films, really old films, from back in the day when they used VHS’s and DVD’s, very primitive things. But, that era had some of the best films.

The twins decided to put their knowledge of these films to good use, in their minds anyway. They remembered one film where a man on an old submersible ship had taken a metal box, put four marbles in it, and set it in a vent above another mans head. Whenever the boat tilted or moved the marbles would roll around in the box and make an awful racket. The man could never find what was making the noise, and it bothered him terribly.

Since spaceships don’t tilt, the twins decided to modify the idea a little bit. On one planet they had visited, they had bought a little remote controlled noisemaker. When they pressed the button it would make a loud squealing noise, similar to the noise when fingernails go across a blackboard.

One day they snuck into one of the ventilation tubes and taped the noisemaker right inside the air duct to Mr. Grimes’ suite. The noisemaker was very small and gray, so that anyone casually inspecting the tube would not see it. After they had set it, they left the tube and sat in the corridor waiting for dear Mr. Grimes to come back.

They watched as he came around the corner and went into his room. After a few moments they turned on the device. They sat, waiting, listening, and watching. When they didn’t hear a shriek they turned up the volume. After about five minutes Mr. Grimes practically ran out of his suite holding his ears.

They slowly snuck after him. They saw him enter the captain’s cabin, and a few minutes later they both came out. The captain’s face was set into hard, annoyed lines. Quickly, the twins turned off the noisemaker. They followed a short distance behind, and watched as the captain came out of Mr. Grimes’ suite telling him that there was nothing there.

They got up and went past his suite as if on the way to theirs. “Children,” the captain said in a stern, suspicious voice, “what do you know about a strange noise in Mr. Grimes’ suite?”

“A strange noise, sir? In Mr. Grimes’s suite?” Daniel said in an innocent voice.

“Sir,” Hannah added. “We haven’t been in Mr. Grimes’s suite. We’ve been in the corridors most of the morning.”

The captain gave them a dubious look. But he went on his way. “Good evening, Mr. Grimes,” Hannah said sweetly, “I hope that noise doesn’t affect your sleep too much.”

“Goodnight, Mr. Grimes,” Daniel added. “Sleep well.” Then they hurried into their parents suite.

Late that night, when the whole ship was asleep, Mr. Grimes headed to bed. It had been a disturbing day. He didn’t like mysteries, when they happened to him, and those children had been a little too... nice.

Suddenly, he heard a long, sharp, squealing sound. It sent shivers down his spine. And made the hair on the back of his neck stand up straight. It stopped after a few seconds. Slowly, his heart stopped racing, and his breathing became normal again.

As if on cue, the noise began again. That slow, unnerving sound. It stopped again. He waited, and waited. He calmed down, thinking it was just the ship, or maybe some of those Nanorats he had been told about. He got into his bed.

Before bed he always read a chapter or so of a book. Just to calm him down. Tonight it was a mystery. He was reaching the climactic point where the hero was being stalked by the murderer. The hero heard a squeak behind him, like that of an ancient door. Then, he heard footsteps. A voice told him he was about to perish... then, that same loud squealing happened again.

Mr. Grimes put down his book. He looked around. And, for the first time since he was a little kid, he turned off the light and hid under the covers. The squealing stopped. Finally, a half hour later, he began to calm down. And, after thinking about it, to feel very foolish. He was an adult, too old to allow himself to be frightened by the combination of a silly fictional story and some odd noises.

And the more he thought about it, the more convinced he was that those two twins had been involved in it. As he lay there in bed, he thought. Children could be such nuisances. And yet, there was something nagging in the back his mind, some feeling, and course of action that he very much wanted to take. He went over to a chest in the corner of his suite. Kneeling down, he opened it. He smiled as he surveyed the contents. It’s the simple things in life you treasure.

To this day no one knows exactly what was in that chest. All we know is that the twins seemed to have met their match.

After the night of noise, Mr. Grimes asked the captain if he could exchange suites with the Miguels. They agreed and began moving their things. Later that day the twins snuck around and moved the noisemaker. As they were crawling out of the ventilation tube Mr. Grimes came around the corner, stopped and looked at them.

The expression on his face wasn’t mean, exactly, just... different. The twins smiled and did their little “we’re such good little children” routine. Mr. Grimes smiled a nervous kind of smile, like the one you get when you are around a nasty dog, patted them each on the head, and went on his way.

Later that day the twin’s mother made them take a bath. Hannah didn’t mind it so much, and went quite willingly into her shower stall to wash up. Daniel, like all little boys, fought it. But finally his mom had heard enough of his complaining, and, coming in, managed to dunk his head under the water; he came up sputtering and acting like she had tried to drown him, and got out as soon as he could. Their mother gave them their towels and instructions to dry off while she was gone. When she came back in a few minutes she stopped short. The hair on top of each twin’s head was bright pink! Needless to say she was a little startled.

“Alright, what did you get into while I was gone?” she asked.

“Huh?” the twins asked in unison. “What do you mean? We were drying our hair like you told us to...” They stopped short as they saw each other’s hair. Hannah’s first reaction was to shriek. Her hair, even at seven, was her pride and joy. Daniel on the other hand said, “Cool! Hey Mom, maybe baths aren’t so bad when you do it on a spaceship. Was it the water? Can I do this every time I have a bath?”

Their mother told them both to go and wash their hair again. When they did their hair turned even brighter. Immediately the shampoo got thrown away. And, using a new bottle, they washed their hair again. When they got out the pink was even brighter. Finally, they gave up.

That night at dinner they got a lot of comments on it. Mostly teasing. Though Donny, being pretty much a little boy too, told Daniel it was “awesome” and asked him how he did it. Mr. Grimes remained strangely silent on the subject, not even complaining about Daniel’s constant babbling.

That night the twins decided they should do more to Mr. Grimes, since he hadn’t said anything more about the noises in his room. After discussing it they decided to put itching powder in his laundry. It would be easy enough to do. All the laundry was washed once a week, and then placed outside the suites.

Since tomorrow was Mr. Grimes’ day for washing they set their plan into action immediately. The next day they watched, and as soon as the laundry bag was set down they darted over and shook a little packet of the powder into the opening. Then they shook the bag a little and went back to their suite.

That night at dinner Mr. Grimes acted very strangely, wiggling and shifting, scratching and wincing. The twins ate their dinner quietly and even resisted the urge to make a comment about bad table manners, as Mr. Grimes would have done.

The next day was they and their parents’ day for washing. As usual, they washed everything except what they were wearing. That day in chemistry class they had been learning about various dyes, and Daniel, not surprisingly, spilled some green dye on his clothes. They picked up the laundry bags right before dinner and Daniel went to change. On opening the bag he found that none of his clothes were in the bag, only Hannah’s. He called his mom and they went down to the laundry room and looked.

When they got back to the room his mom told him he would just have to wear Hannah’s clothing. So, protesting the whole while, he put on one of Hannah least frilly shirts (which boasted in large letters the word ‘Princess’ on it) and a pair of shorts.

During dinner that night Daniel was very quiet. After his parents explained the phenomenon, everyone was mercifully silent about it, but Daniel still heard all the stifled giggles and saw all the hidden smiles. No little boy had ever been so embarrassed.

The next morning a laundry bag was found outside the Miguel’s suite door. Inside it was all of Daniel’s clothing. Gratefully, Daniel put on a boy’s shirt with a manly truck on it. He then vowed that when he had a son, he would never make him wear his sister’s clothes.

* * *

Soon, Mr. Grimes’ stop loomed before the ship. During the time before his departure the mysterious happenings had grown more and more amusing. For instance, there was the noodle incident. (Do you have any idea what happens to spaghetti when it is flushed down a toilet?) And then there was the time the twins found glue in their shoes. (Fortunately they soon found it was water-soluble.) The list goes on. But, at last it was time for him to depart.

As he was about to walk down the gangplank, he stopped, turned to the twins, gave them each a solemn wink, and said, “You know, I would recommend club soda for that hair.” He then turned and continued down the ramp.

After a long silence, the captain walked over to the Miguels. “Well,” he said, “I had wondered why Mr. Grimes asked me to give you this recording, but I believe I understand now. Dismissed.”

As soon as the Miguel’s got back to their suite they turned on their 3-D reader, and the parents were soon doubled over in laughter. The twins, however, looked a bit shocked. This was the message, in the form of bent, wrinkled, old Mr. Grimes:

Proceed to part 9...